ANGEL’S
BEATS
The heart
is not just a universal representation of love, but it’s also the source of
life. Human heart beats 3 billion times without stopping. My heart and yours
work endlessly, even when we are sound asleep. If our hearts stop beating, we cannot
see the beauty of this world. When my mother leaves me due to heart disease, I
promise myself I will become someone who supports and help others who are
battling with this no. 1 disease killer.
Then
there is a person I’m destined to meet, Anthony. He’s tall, brilliant, handsome,
and one of the most well-known pediatric surgeons. In his late 20s, he becomes
the chief of pediatric cardiology surgery at Nationwide Children’s Hospital. My
heart races when I meet him for the first time, even more so when in a few
years later, he takes out a small red box, gets on his knees, and proposes to me.
When our
daughter is born, I’m bowled over by complete bewilderment, it feels so surreal.
I hold her tinny, little body in my arms and I cry to myself. She’s so beautiful.
As I hold her in my arms, she stops crying, and try to open her eyes. Then, she
blinks at me and reaches for me, holding my finger with her chubby little hand.
I think my heart is about to burst with happiness. I realize at that moment
that I will do anything for her and protect her with my life.
“Thank you, Maya. Our family is complete now.”
Anthony said with tears of happiness in his eyes. He kisses my forehead and
holds the both of us in his arms.
We name our little angel Mia. She becomes our
world. She grows into a beautiful and cheerful girl with a bright smile. The
smile that’s still bright even when it’s in
stark contrast to her pale face as she lies on the hospital bed now.
“Daddy!”
I turn
away from my daughter and see Anthony enters the room with something in his
hand. Since I resigned from my job, Anthony works harder for the cost of Mia's
medical expenses. Even though exhaustion can clearly be seen on his handsome
face, Anthony always tries to hide it with a warm smile.
“Hi,
darling. I’m sorry I come late,” Anthony approaches me and kisses my forehead.
“That’s
ok. You’ve worked hard for us.” I smile gently.
Anthony
smiles back and turns his attention to Mia. "Hi, sweet heart. Daddy brings
a new friend for you.” He said, holding a large pink teddy bear in front of
Mia.
“Pink
Teddy!” Mia extends her hands to get the doll.
Anthony
takes back the doll and hides it behind his back, “Have you been a good girl
today? Have you taken the medicines?”
"Yeah,
but I don't like them. They're
so bitter,"
Mia said, sticking
out her tongue.
"Daddy's
princess is
strong. You take the medicines so
that you can recover quickly.
When you have recovered, we can go
on picnic again," Anthony
said, gives Mia the pink teddy bear which she immediately hugs.
"I
don’t want to go on a picnic, Daddy," Mia pouts and looks up at her father
with her
big round
eyes.
"Then,
where do you want
to go?"
"I
want to go to the amusement park!"
"Yes,
yes. Later, when
you have recovered Daddy
will take you anywhere you
want."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
Mia hands
her little finger which is greeted
by Anthony's. They make a pinky promise.
The sun’s
ray shines through the window, casting a beautiful warm glow onto my husband
and my daughter. My heart is filled with warmth as I watch their interaction. Anthony’s stern face and tall, well-built
stature often make people feel intimidated, but to us, he’s solely a gentle father
and husband. Mia’s chatters and laugh are like a bell that rings happiness in
my heart.
We’d be a
perfect happy family, if only that thing didn’t happen.
At that time, Mia had just entered her kindergarten. On a weekend, we took Mia to the beach.
Mia was building a sand castle with a blue shovel and a pink bucket made from
plastic, while Anthony and I sat next to her, watching her.
I turned my attention away from Mia for a while to
take some pictures of me and Anthony, but when I
looked at where Mia was supposed to be, she was gone.
I immediately started to panic, “Anthony, where's Mia?!"
We looked around us.The beach is hot and sunny, crowded by people who
were also spending their vacations. It was hard to find Mia among those
children. Something caught Anthony’s eyes then he ran toward
the water.
“Mia!”
Mia was walking toward the water! I thought my heart
was about to stop. I ran as fast as I could to her.
Mia's distance from the waves was still quite far away. Luckily, I still had time to realize the
loss of Mia and Anthony who took Mia back. My mind was filled with various
horrific scenarios
of what would
happen if we were just a little bit too late.
"Mia,
why are you here? You’re okay, right?" I immediately held Mia into my
arms while stroking her back.
But Mia's attention was still fixed on the ocean in
front of us.
"Mia?" Anthony asked in puzzlement.
Then suddenly Mia fell unconscious. Her body temperature rose and her
pulse beat weakly.
Her face was very pale, even her lips were a bit purplish. With great panic,
we immediately took Mia to the nearest hospital.
I had
often faced patients in critical condition and as a doctor I always able to control myself to
stay calm and think clearly. But this time, the one in a critical condition was
Mia, our only daughter, my mind was
chaotic and my hands were trembling in cold sweat, even my
feet felt weak.
After we
arrived at the hospital, Mia was immediately rushed to the
emergency room. A
nurse forbade us from entering.
"I have to check on my daughter. I'm also a doctor." Anthony said
firmly while showing his ID card as a doctor.
"I'm sorry. But only the doctors from this
hospital have the
authority to enter."
"I'm Dr. Anthony from Nationwide Children Hospital.
Let me in. Now! "
"But-"
"Let him go inside."
I looked behind me and saw a doctor we knew, Dr.
Frans. He had been our acquaintance for years. In his late 30s, he radiated a
powerful and wise aura.
"Dr. Anthony, Dr. Maya, it seems like it's not
the right time for me to say nice to meet you here. What happened?” asked Dr.
Frans as
he
approached us.
"Our daughter fainted suddenly. She’s in a
critical condition now. I have to safe her!" Anthony, who was usually calm
and cool, was also on
edge.
"Come." Dr. Frans invited Anthony in.
When I was about to enter the room following behind
Anthony and Dr. Frans, Anthony turned back and stopped me.
"You stay here." Said Anthony firmly with
his hands held on my arms.
"No, I have to go inside too. She’s my
daughter! ”
"Maya, darling, please, trust me, Mia will be
fine. I'm going to safe our daughter. I need you to stay here. I need your support and pray that
our
daughter will be alright. "
I opened my mouth to protest, but I held back my intention when
I saw Anthony's eyes look
at me deeply with resolute. I sighed and nodded.
"I'm going to safe our daughter."
After saying that, Anthony entered the Emergency Room.
All
this time Mia had
always been a cheerful and healthy girl. Why did she
suddenly become like this? If only I didn't take her to the beach, If only I didn’t
take my eyes off her
even for
a second, maybe Mia wouldn’t be like this.
My heart hurt to see my daughter's condition like
this and even more devastated when Anthony said Mia had heart failure.
At that time Mia was saved. But shortly after that,
day after day, Mia's condition worsened. Her body was getting weaker.
Even now
she can’t leave her bed.
I'm
peeling an apple for
Mia while she
was watching her favorite cartoon on her bed. Anthony went
out early in the morning and has not come back.
"Mommy,
where did Daddy go?"
Mia said all of a sudden, pulls me out from my thoughts.
I
don't know how to
answer my daughter's question because I also don't know where he went. Anthony just said there is
something he has
to check and leaves
after looking at his phone.
"Daddy
is checking the patients,
princess."
Only this reason came to mind.
"But
this is Sunday, Mommy. Usually Daddy is always with me."
I
fall silent. This is
indeed not the first time Anthony leaves with unclear reason. He becomes busier
than usual and often checks his cellphone even though he is with our daughter. My heart pounds
uncomfortably.
"Ouch."
I accidentally cut
my finger.
"Mom?"
Not
wanting to make Mia panic, I clench my fist to hide my finger.
"It's
nothing. Mommy
will go to buy food
for a moment. Mia, be a good girl here, ok? "
With a
still confused look, Mia replies, "Yes, Mommy."
I leave Mia's room to clean my wound and look
for a band-aid. I look for a nurse to watch
over Mia when
I see
a group of nurses gossiping.
How can
they have time to gossip in the middle of work? I approach them to reprimand them, but I
stop in my track when
I catch what they are
talking.
"Poor
Dr. Maya. Her child has a terminal illness and now her husband is having an
affair. "
"Who
would ever guess? Dr. Anthony seems like a good devoted man. "
"He's
busy working all day and he has a daughter with a fatal illness. Maybe his wife forgets to take
care of him too. What kind of woman who wouldn't fall for a lonely
handsome doctor like Dr. Anthony?”
"To
make the matter worse, he has an affair with his patient's mother, especially a
widow.”
I can
only freeze silently. My heart is tearing apart with every word they say. The nurses have
their back on me so they can't see me. Until one of them turn her head and catch
me looking at them. She immediately pats
the other nurses
to stop their talk.
"Dr-Dr.
Maya." The nurses stammered.
I take
a deep breath and exhale.
I look up to hold back my
tears. After painstakingly controlling my emotions, I ask them, "Who were
you talking about?"
They don't answer and just look down.
"Who
's the other woman you were talking about?" This time I asked in a
firmer tone.
"She's
a mother of a patient named Angel from the Jasmine Room No. 9."
Without
waiting any longer, I go to
the said room.
I ignore every pair of eyes that look at
me with confusion. With every
step I take, I pray that Anthony wouldn't be in that room. Anywhere, but
there. Please,
don’t let the reason
Anthony has less time for Mia is
because he gives special attention to one of his patients, because he has an
affair with his patient's mother.
My heart is beating like mad as I open the No. 9 Jasmine room, and step inside. Someone who stands in front of me with a surprised
look is no other but
the person who has
been the partner
of my life for 7 years, Anthony.
"Maya?"
Turning
my gaze from Anthony who is
still surprised, I see a
little girl whose eyes are covered
by bandages lying on the hospital bed. Beside her is a familiar looking teddy
bear in white color. Next to the bedside, a young mother looks at me with a
confused look. She is beautiful.
So this
woman is the one who takes my husband from me and our dying
daughter?
"Maya,
I was checking on my patient. "
"On
Sunday? And every other days? "I asked furiously.
"I
can explain later.” Anthony looks at my hand, “Maya, your finger is bleeding."
Anthony approachess me and about to take my hand, but I brush him off.
I can’t
hold back my tears anymore. With a trembling voice I whisper, "How could
you?"
I rush
out from the room. My mind is chaotic and the pain in my finger is not nothing
compared to the pain
in my heart. I want to go back to Mia. I’ve left her by
herself for too long.
But I can't let her
see me in this condition. I ignore the voice of Anthony calling my
name from my back.
I need to
calm down first. My legs take me out from the hospital building. Suddenly,
I feel someone pull
my hand from behind. When I see that
person is
Anthony, I try to
brush it off again, but his strong grip makes my efforts futile. Anthony pull me to the parking area, head to our car. He opens the door and
tells me
to enter. I hesitate for a moment but go inside.
We are
silent. No one dares
to break the ice. My hand feel
too weak to resist when Anthony pull my injured finger
gently. My
eyes open widely when I
see him suck out
the blood from my injured finger.
"Trying
to be romantic now? I won't forgive you just because of this," I said
curtly.
"You
misunderstand. I only helped a patient," Anthony answered calmly.
"Helped
a patient? Our daughter is dying! How could you leave Mia for another woman's
child?"
"They
need help. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to add burdens on you.
You’ve already gone through so much. The little girl you saw there, it was Angel. She’s cheerful girl and the
same age with Mia. She’s an unfortunate child too and can't last much longer. Not
to mention her mother is poor and unable to neither hear
nor speak. Angel
reminds me so much
of Mia. I can't not help her. "
Hearing
Anthony's explanation makes my
heart sink. I didn't expect it at all.
"Do
you know that people are talking about your affair with her mother?" I
asked.
"That's
non sense. I'm sorry you had
to hear it, but it's completely untrue. The only woman I love is the one I'm
looking at right now," Anthony grasps my hands tightly and looked at me
deep in the eyes. "The mother of my child, the only woman I love until my
last breath is you. You and Mia are my life."
I fall
silent, unable to
say anything.
"It's
my fault for not telling you about Angel,
but as a human being we have to help each other. Even when
we're in a down condition, if there are people we can help, we have to help them."
I'm
touched by what
Anthony said. Stress and worries from Mia’s condition made me become very
sensitive. I should’ve trusted my husband more than anyone else.
I should've listened
to him
first, instead of jumping to a terrible conclusion. Before I can say anything, Anthony's
cellphone rings.
Anthony
looks shocked by what is
said by the other person on the phone.
After the call is finished,
Anthony tells
me, "Angel passed
away."
I gasp in
surprise. We were with her just a while ago
but now
she's gone.
Guilt seeps into my chest. I had suspected them terribly.
"Let’s
meet them to give our condolence," Anthony said.
I nod
and go with him to Angel's room.
Angel lies
rigid on her bed. The bandages
around her eyes can't hide
her sweet face, even her small lips curves up into a smile until the end of her life. Such a
poor girl. No wonder
Anthony insisted on helping her, especially after I notice closely that this
girl indeed looks
quite similar to
Mia. Tear falls from my eyes.
I look
at her mother by her side.
Tears run
down her cheeks and sadness is
clearly visible on her face.
But instead of crying hysterically, she looks rather calm. As if she has let go of her daughter's
departure. When our eyes meet,
she
immediately comes closer to me.
She
grasps
my hands and bows down a few times as if saying thank you. She
tries to say
something but only incoherent sounds come out. She turns
to look at Anthony. She
tries to say what she wants to say with sign language which is translated by
Anthony:
"Thank you for helping us. I felt hopeless
about my daughter's condition. I am poor and cannot hear nor speak. But then an angel came
to help us. Thanks to your
husband, my daughter was still able to smile and didn't give up. Even though Angel still has to go, I can let her go because I could
see my daughter smiled and happy until the end of her life. I am sorry that a
bad thing happens
to your daughter
too. As a fellow mother, I really understand your
feelings."
Unable to
hold back
the guilt and emotions
I feel, I
hug her tightly. Even though I know she can't hear
me, I still apologize for having wronged
them.
Suddenly, a nurse who was one of the
gossiping nurses enters
the room. With panic she
announces, "Dr. Anthony, Dr. Maya, Mia collapsed.”
I feel
like my world is about to end.
We rush
to our daughter
immediately. No, I'm
not ready to lose a daughter too.
I'm not ready if Mia has to be taken away from me now.
"Mia
can't hold
on anymore. The only way for her to survive
is by heart
transplantation."
My chest feel tight, my whole body is shaking, and
tears stream down my cheeks. I falter, then Anthony holds me steady. He tries to stay calm his eyes also turn red. He
embraces me to sooth me down.
We both
have known that heart transplantation
is the only way to
save our daughter,
but getting a heart donor, especially a suitable one is very
difficult. If Mia
doesn't get a heart transplant now, she will...
Someone
is tugging at my clothes.
When I look sideways,
I see Angel's
mother stands beside me.
With sign language she says:
"As my gratitude for helping my daughter, I am
willing to donate my daughter's heart for your daughter."
I'm
shocked and can
hardly believe it.
The donor we've been
waiting for have finally come. I hug Angle's mother as I
say, "Thank
you. Thank you very much."
Although
we've got the donor,
we still can't be fully relieved from the possibility of
transplant rejection
and a
failure at the operating table. I
hold on my faith and pray
to God to safe Mia.
After
many hours later which feel like a century, Anthony comes out from the operating room.
He takes of his mask, but he just
looks
at me and says nothing.
"Anthony,
how is Mia? She
is saved,
right? "
Anthony
holds me tightly into his arms and says, "Our daughter is back."
For the
first time in a very long time, these flowing tears are no longer due to sadness, but
because of happiness and gratitude for the life of our daughter.
When
something bad happens to us, we often feel that life is unfair. It's as if we
are the most suffering people in this world. But if we take time to look around
us, maybe we can see that there are actually still many people who are more
unfortunate. What makes us human is helping each other. With faith and
never give up, miracle
is not
something impossible.
Like what happened to our daughter, Mia.
Now Mia
can smile again and run around happily. Anthony keeps his promise to take Mia
to the amusement park. We ride
various attractions
such as Doll Castle,
Merry-go-round, and
watch musical
performances. I
feel so happy that we can be a whole family again, without worrying for
every second if
suddenly our daughter will be taken away from us. Our days which were once dark
and full of tears now feel warm and full of laughter. Our angel’s heart beats for life.
***
Ervina Restiani
1530911021
Creative Writing (Short Story)